Crazy and/or Well-Moisturized
Like most Americans, our office spent an inordinate amount of time after the Super Bowl talking about the ads (and also relishing in our local area sports team’s third championship in five years, but I don’t want to rub that in because we have prospective deals in both Baltimore and the Bay Area). And while we enjoyed The DunKings ad a lot, the consensus favorite was Michael Cera revealing that human skin is his passion. And it was in the course of reaching that conclusion via the Socratic method that Brent noticed a small white tub on Holly’s (shoutout Gen Z and thanks for your help writing this one) desk and said, “Wait, is that CeraVe?”
And as soon as he said it we could all see Holly winding up and then maybe Brent regretting that he asked.
“Yes!” she said. “I carry a travel-sized CeraVe Daily Moisturizing Lotion with me everywhere I go. I keep a 12 oz. tub of CeraVe Moisturizing Cream at my desk, a 16 oz. pump top tub of CeraVe Moisturizing Cream on my nightstand, and a 19 oz. tub of CeraVe Moisturizing Cream in the waiting just in case I run out. Some might call this crazy; I call it being well-moisturized. But you know what the problem is, Brent?”
Brent looked at me for support, but there was no way I was intervening.
“The problem, Brent, is that a few years ago I splurged and purchased the 16 oz. pump top CeraVe Moisturizing Cream. Each time the tub ran out of cream, I just purchased a non-pump top replacement tub, and changed out the lids. Until December 8, 2023, when I didn’t want to brave the holiday rush at Target and opted to order the 19 oz. tub from Amazon for $16.02. While I thought I was getting more bang for my buck, the 16 oz. pump top lid doesn’t fit the 19 oz. container. Can you believe that, Brent?”
Brent again looked at me, but I averted my gaze.
“So now there I am, Brent, physically scooping the cream out of the 19 oz. tub and into the 16 oz. container like I’m Pooh Bear with a honey pot just so I can use my pump top. Does that seem right, Brent?”
“How much more is the 19 oz. container with a pump top?” Brent asked.
“Double the price,” responded Holly.
“In dollars?” Brent inquired.
“16!” said an outraged Holly.
“Can I give you $16?” asked Brent, hoping beyond hope that Holly would say yes.
“It’s not the money, it’s the principle, Brent. Both you and Michael Cera should understand that. The tub lids should all be the same diameter so I can continue using my years old pump top on new tubs of this fabulous moisturizing cream.”
And it ended there because fortunately Jenny had catered in barbecue for the office that day so we all had a pulled pork lunch to get to, but it just goes to show that even innocent questions can prompt unlikely diatribes.
As for why I am telling this story here, I (1) needed to acknowledge that the Chiefs won the Super Bowl (again, sorry Baltimore and the Bay Area); (2) thought it was funny; and (3) wanted to revisit the risk/reward calculus of businesses making life harder on their customers in pursuit of near-term profits. This is also Amazon continuing to degrade the value proposition of Prime and food companies that shrink portions to surreptitiously maintain margins amid rising costs.
Businesses, of course, are frequently run by the numbers, but it’s one thing for them to be an objective and another to be a byproduct. As for whether or not juicing profits by charging more for no-longer-interchangeable pump tops is what’s behind CeraVe’s packaging geometry, I have no idea. But I do think Holly, whether crazy and/or well-moisturized, has a point.
-Tim
